Realization
by Coolez
Summary: Sometimes… you never realize how important something is, until they're gone… and maybe gone forever. With Eren gone after humanity's victory, Armin takes off to the outside world himself, with the possibility of not ever returning. Will Mikasa finally recognize something she has never all these years before? - Mikasa Ackerman x Armin Arlert [AruMika]
1. Chapter 1

**Note: **This will be multi-chaptered. I'm guessing around two c:

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><p>The day was as clear as crystal, no visible blood stain that reminds any of the times where those beasts invaded their lives. The bird flew across above the fallen gates of Maria, while there were only two humans in the scene.<p>

"Armin…?" a girl of raven black hair asked softly, as her blond friend climbs up his steed, as if preparing for a long journey that might never end. When he looked at her, his charming blue eyes was as if reflected by the skies, added with a little shine from the sun. He wore a charming smile; one unrecognized years ago. He used to have shoulder length hair, though he had recently cut it shorter in preparation for his new journey.

"Yeah?" he replied politely. The girl wore a red scarf around her neck, and her arm was being supported by a sling; noted, it was broken. Her eyes matched her hair's colour - as dark as night, and with the sun's shine, it was twinkling like the stars that shines at night. She wore a blank expression, though inside, she was confused of the scene before her - where is her friend going now?

Armin smiled, now on his horse. He turned to look at the girl he was about to leave. "He's gone now… but I'll continue our dream. I'll go to the outside world. I'll… I'll see the sea of fire, the land of ice; if possible." he said. A gust of wind blew by, having no response from both parties. Armin tucked the loose part of his fringe to the back of his ear, before trying to speak again.

"And since you're wounded… it wouldn't be wise… so…" he tried to continue, and with each word, his tone grew softer, until nothing came out of his mouth. The girl nodded, understanding. She gave him a half-smile, ensuring him that she will be okay. He nodded in response, returning the warm smile.

"I.. may not be back. What I mean is, I'll return… somewhere around these walls, someday. So… take… take care, Mikasa." he turned back around, unable to face the girl any longer. Mikasa stood there, still expressionless, while mouthing a farewell to her long-time friend, and perhaps the most trusted companion left; who is about to leave her, too.

With a tug of her horse, Armin raced outside the walls, not looking back. Mikasa said nothing - her hands automatically waved goodbye, and she stood still, watching him go - further, and further. For some reason, she wanted to go with him; but he's right. Her condition right now would not allow it.

After what can be compared to eternity, Mikasa turned around to walk home - otherwise a hut near to where the Jaeger family's home was once situated. Wall Maria was still silence, because even after all this while, not many dared to leave the inner wall just yet; they were too comfortable inside. Those who choose to go outside is with their free will, as the rule that once said to not show any interest of the outside world is now abolished.

While walking back slower than a tortoise, Mikasa said something. Something that even her herself wasn't quite sure why she would have said. Something that's so simple, yet so complicated. Something that means nothing, and at the same time means everything:

"I'll miss you, Armin."

And she knows it was different than any other time she had said it; if she had ever said it, even once. She felt heavy recalling the heavenly smile Armin had provided only just before he left, how his eyes mixed well with the sky itself. All this while before, her mind was filled with Eren; and now he's gone. But she had promised him not to grief over it - and she will not. She will live on; she can't remember him if she herself is dead, right?

It was a cold truth at first, but then again, Eren won't be happy seeing her unhappy, right? With her free hand, she hugged herself and kept on moving towards the north, away from Maria's gate. The walk was long, she was taking it slow. The weather was exceptionally cold, as if it changed from warm and friendly, to cold as unwelcoming. The sun still stood bright above her, but it's heat was unable to reach her. She was shivering, she was cold.

Passing empty homes, mostly, abandoned stores and markets - she finally reached 'home', or what can be called home for that time being. She pushed the door with her uninjured hand, having it to creak open. Inside, it was supposing dark, but with the reflected rays of the sun, the little house was quite bright.

There were three rooms; one, the main, which is presumably the living room. A small route leads to the kitchen, and a slightly larger one leads to a small bedroom. In a side of the living room, there was a couch large enough for three; though a bit torn and old. Near it, there was a desk and chair, otherwise a work table. The rest of the place was pretty empty; the floors were made of wood, just as the walls were of concrete.

Mikasa took baby steps inside, feeling a bit weak. Once she reached the couch, she threw herself onto it; without caring if it'll affect her wound. Everyone's practically gone off her world now… First Eren, now Armin's out on his own. Everyone has left her on her own, only with the cold as a companion.

She sighs, the unharmed hand supporting the harmed. She felt drowsy, she felt tired. Now that humanity has achieved what their goal has been for eternity as long, she felt empty. Nothing she could be useful for, now even left alone. She could go around Wall Rose in an attempt to find company of others she could have considered friends; but her heart tells her it'll turn out better the other way around.

Subconsciously, tears leaked off her eyes, as she slowly drifts asleep, though would any dream she enter be peaceful, even if humanity has won?

The answer was simple: No.

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><p>(AN: Just like Journey's End [EreMika], I bring you Realization [AruMika], which was originally just a figment of my imagination of my OCs. Except in this one, Eren dies, while in my original version, the 'Eren' doesn't die owo Still, I hope you guys enjoyed this!

Chapter Two coming either tomorrow or a few days!)


	2. Chapter 2

**Note: **Final Chapter; it's chapter two!

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><p>It's been half a year since humanity has regained it's lands, reclaimed it from the beasts who once ruled over. The walls were no longer a neccesity, as now the humans could roam freely even beyond it - and exactly 5 months ago, a boy whose hair was of golden streaks, and eyes of the sea, travelled outside on horseback, with chances that might never be back.<p>

Back inside Wall Maria, the place was becoming more and more crowded; though still not as packed as Sina or Rose itself. The humans still cower inside the innermost, even after being reassured that the Titans would never again return. The gates of Maria were insecure; broken down and never repaired. It was the King's order; though the reason behind it is still unclear, still dim in the light.

Meters away from where the Jaeger household was once situated, a small house was there, and life was in it. A girl, who has black hair and eyes, lives there temporarily by her own: Mikasa Ackerman.

"It's been a while since we won…." the girl sat on the chair next to a desk, scribbling down whatever her mind gives. "And I've been directionless." she continues, a clear frown visible on her face. She placed the pen down and looked down at the paper she wrote on and sighed. She pushed her fringe back, then letting it go again.

She placed her chin on the table, exhaling. She closed her eyes and thought for a while. "Eren's been gone for six months…" she whispered, though her tone no longer showed sadness. "Thank you for everything." she continued, a small smile appeared from her face. She opened her eyes and took the pen again, writing down what she had just said. Then, she started to write rapidly, likewise a burst of inspiration had shot her.

"Jean… that fool's back in Trost, he's been fine, as far as I've heard." she laughed quietly. "Sasha went back to her village, now one of the most well-known." she continued, recalling memories of the potato girl. "Connie… he's been around inside the walls. He never settled, but up to what I've heard, he's been alright." Mikasa bent forward, more absorbed in writing.

"Christa- Historia's finally back to where she once was; Sina, only now with Ymir by her side, she appears to be complete." she sighed contently, still smiling. "Corporal stayed behind in the military… just like Squad Leader Hanji. They both are still with the government, trying to clean up the tails of the mess." her hands come to a halt. She stared at the paper for a while, memories of a certain blond boy resurfacing.

"Armin…." she started, the smile on her face slowly fading into nothing. "I haven't heard from him at all… I hope… I hope he's alright." she slowly wrote, word by word, letter by letter, her heart aching without a meaningful reason that she understands. She once again let go of the pen she held, dropping it carelessly on the table. Both her hands messed her hair, while she shook furiously.

She stood up from the chair, walking close to the couch behind of her. There, she threw herself on it, left palm resting on her own forehead. Her eyes were partially open, and the feeling of about to cry overwhelmed her. Her raven dark eyes were sparkling, as the sun shone in with a tiny hint of tears that was about to leak. Her other hand formed a fist, which she gripped tight.

After laying around for a minute or two, she got up. She felt weak, as weak as the day that the blond boy left her. But she had absolutely no control over her body at that very moment; it was as if she was being controlled, manipulated by someone, when there's really nobody doing so. She pulled the red scarf that's around her neck tighter, before making her way to the door.

Carefully, she pushed the door open. Sunlight and wind rushed in, caressing her hair and gentle face. She took small steps to the front, making her way outside. The door behind her then closed. Mikasa walked against the wind's blow, down south where the fallen gate of Maria is at. She had no idea why she was walking towards it; she didn't want to go outside. Not yet, at least. Not today.

But her feet was taking her there. The sun may be up, standing tall, but the wind was the king - the weather was furiously cold, and Mikasa knew she was shivering. With her two hands, she hugged herself, continuing her journey to the part of town where she had no idea of why she was going.

"…I don't care anymore…" she wanted to turn back, but her body didn't react with her brain; and that's when she gave up, deciding that if her body wants to go there, then there was something important. Or at least, up to her observations, these actions might lead to something important.

Soon enough, she was at the open gates of Wall Maria, splitting away the outer and the inner. She stood at the middle of the gate, getting a clear view of the vast world outside; once a battlefield, now a place to be explored. But not anytime soon would she venture out, not until the clog in her heart disappeared.

She went to one side and sat down. The wind was still howling, so the cold disturbed her. The expression on her face remained unchanged - still blank, still in the verge of crying. She wrapped her arms around her legs and dug her face onto them. Tears started to leak out of her eyes, droplet by droplet.

And then she remembered somebody.

A certain blond boy, at a very young age of when they met, used to cry when bullies come around him. But those tears heals when she and Eren comes to the scene. Those tears will slowly disappear into nothing but happiness.  
>That certain blond boy, who when as a soldier, sought for the freedom of humanity, the boy who wanted to see the world outside, the boy who was not afraid to show his tears to his comrades. The boy who was very brave, though at many times he failed to recognize his own ability.<p>

The boy by the name of Armin Arlert.

She sighed softly, while more tears flowed out of her eyes, wetting the ground. Just then, rain drops started to fall from the sky, bathing the floors of the earth. Mikasa did not move an inch; she just stayed there, silently crying. She knew she had to go back, she would become sick; and it'd be very troublesome to go all the way to Rose for supplies.

She covered her mouth with her red scarf, gripping onto it tight. Under her breath, she mumbled a familiar name - the name of the blond boy who has been on her mind since that day. The name of the boy _who never left her thoughts. _

"Armin." she said, as tears flow out faster than a river's current. She's no longer holding back; she's letting it all go, once and for all. She's not going to deny anything that might strikes, she's going live through it. As the wind runs around her, she battles to keep herself warm. The rain continued pouring, not a care for the people that it bathes upon.

On the other side of the wall was a boy; a boy who was also being showered by the rain's tears. A boy who was also letting go droplets off his own eyes. A boy who wears blue eyes and blond hair; that boy who Mikasa had been wanting to see, to hear from since a very, very long time.

He had heard her calling his name, he has had his heart broken. He even broke hers. And this was the last straw; he had to seek out the truth.

The boy creaks out of his place of hiding, walking to the front of the girl, whose head was still buried in her legs. The boy squatted down, holding out his hand. "Mikasa." he called, rather, whisper, just about loud enough to be heard during the downfall.

Slowly, she peeped up, her eyes meeting his. Her hands held onto his, as he pulled her up. He was shorter than her when they were soldiers; now the blond has grown slightly taller. In an instant, he pulled her into a hug, begging her not to cry any longer.

"Please… please don't cry." he closed his eyes, a hand caressing the girl's head. She slowed down, though to no halt. "I've… I've missed you. I'm sorry, Mikasa. I'm so, so sorry." he said, knowing that no words would come out of his companion's mouth right at the moment. He pulled back and registered her face; as beautiful as ever, before going it again, this time, a kiss of her lips:

Their first kiss.

It shocked Mikasa at first, but then she accepted, what more returned it. It lasted to what could be compared to eternity, because even the rain had stopped pouring. When the two broke apart, they were breathless, and soaked in rain water. Armin refused to let go of her hands.

He took a deep breath, and announces; "I love you, Mikasa.", wiping the tears off the girl's face. She smiles, acknowledging his show of affection. She nods, returning the same phrase to him. He laughs quietly, before the laughter died.

"I'm sorry." he said, with all seriousness. His hands were shaking, and he looked tired. "I'm s-sorry I l-left." he stuttered. Mikasa dived in and hugged, shaking her head. She hugged him tight, not in a will to let go. "You're back." she whispered. Armin smiled. "I guess."

He pulled away, giggling. She smiles softly at his laughter. "Come on, let's get you home and dried." he patted her on the shoulder, eyeing the path that leads north, away from the gate, back _home. _Mikasa nodded, leading the track. Armin followed her, his hand locked with hers as they walked back to the place that holds a priceless memory: Childhood, and friendship.

Along the way, he kept glancing at her; despite being just an inch shorter now, it was still hard. Why? Because she kept looking at him the way he looks at her. And when their eyes met, they would just turn away and each let out a little laugh that rings music to the other's ears.

Midway, Armin suddenly spoke up. "These past six months… I wasn't really that far from the walls." he confessed. Mikasa looked at him, a puzzled look on her face. He looked away, not wanting to meet her eye. He smiled sweetly, trying to not dull the atmosphere.

"I wanted to know what was it like being away from you; and trust me, it was like death." he said jokingly. "But rather, I was being selfish, wasn't I? I didn't notice your feelings; I hurt them." the sweet smile soon was wiped off, replaced by a sorrow frown. He formed a fist with his free hand, gritting his teeth. Mikasa stayed silent, not saying even one word.

Moments of silence later, they finally reached the front of Mikasa's new home. It was a simple house made of concrete, just like the Jaeger's household many years ago. Though this was way smaller. "Armin." Mikasa started, breaking the silence. She tightened her grip on Armin's hand. "You can stay here too, if you want to." she offered. The blond boy blinked at her. "I mean… where would you go?" she quickly corrected.

Armin laughed softly, putting his hands into his pocket. He nods. "Right, I don't really have a place to go." he eyed the house in front of him. "May I…?" he asked, receiving a quick nod from Mikasa. He thanked her, for he really had no where to go; plus the fact that he'd missed her dearly.

"But you have to pay." she said, now coldly. Armin wasn't shocked, he wasn't horrified, but he simply laughed. "Alright, how much would that be?" he reached for money in his pockets, but his actions were cut in a swift when Mikasa kissed him on the lips. His eyes widen, while his cheeks flushed red. He could hear his heartbeat increasing, and while Mikasa's so close, he could hear her's.

"This is that much." she said, pulling away. The blond boy was frozen, eyes still wide. She kissed him.

_She kissed him._

Snapping out of it, he once again looked at Mikasa, who was now at the door of the house. She opened the door, inviting the boy to go in. He walks towards it and stopped at it, while Mikasa stared at him with a smile.

"You never realize how important something is until they're gone, do you?" she asked. He smiled sincerely, nodding, sighing.

"You only know how to appreciate something when they're gone… but now, you're here again. And I'm never letting you go, ever."

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><p>(AN: For those who were confused; Armin grew taller, and assume Mikasa didn't. Eren's dead. Bertholdt, Reiner and Annie's dead *cries*. But I don't know how to kill off Ymir when having to write in Christa/Historia ;w; Also, the paragraph that starts from _Along the way… _until the end is extra, honestly. Didn't know why I wrote it, but I really wanted to write it XD!

Thank you for reading!)


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